First time

I don't belong
At this point, I don't know if i care
But i care about it enough to write about it
I know i care too much about certain people...things....places in my life
Maybe i should stop caring
Would that make me any happier?
Wonder if the people....things.....places...care about me as much as I do them
Never use the term "love" lightly
Wouldn't want to waste the beauty of the word and its meaning to me
I, like many others, have fallen prey to the materialistic view of this world
Focus has been lost somewhere
Working an 8-5 is not satisfaction
Writing at any time
I have found a greater appreciation for music lately thanks to one of my friends
It seems to come on at the right time
Everytime feels like the first time

Scared.

Wrote some things down today.....realized that by writing them down i accepted the truth......i spoke them into existence.....felt every word.....meant every emotion i put on paper......so why do i feel scared?

Anti-Love...Pro-Love

Most of my close friends know how i feel about love.....i'm very protective of my heart.....that doesn't mean that i don't love.....I love a lot of people.....and i love them with all of my heart.....the one thing that scares me is FALLING in love and not having the feeling reciprocated.....some of my friends say that i'm anti-love......some just say i'm scared to love.....and with good reason......i've seen my mom get beat up by the man that she thought loved her (my dad)....she hasn't loved another man since she left him......it hurts me to see her without a companion......for better or worse didn't work out for them......through sickness and health didn't help them...that's about the only memory i have of him.......hitting her.....i had not seen him in 15 yrs when he passed.....had not talked to him in 6......i appreciate my uncles and my cousins.......they make me understand and appreciate men who actually do good by their women and families.......it's been a long time coming but at the age of 25 i have realized that there are some men who love me......who will continue to love me........even though they are overbearing.........and some men who will love me when they meet me.......so anti-love or pro-love.....which one am I.......i'll figure it out sometime soon.......but until then......i really don't KNOW!
WITH LOVE, CIVILITY!

Tonight's Feel!

Inspired by one of my many loves.


Late Night Conversations
Early Morning Rendezvous
Showers filled with Passion
Kisses filled with Lust
That lead to more than just kisses
Tonight's Feel should be everlasting
Tonight's Feel should be every day's feel
Tonight's Feel is You and Me......becoming us
Tonight's Feel.