I miss........

I miss Ethiopia. I miss not having to wake up in the morning for either school or work, therfore, i miss the summers from my childhood. I miss reading. I still read, just not as much. I miss playing. I still play around, just not that meaningless playing with your friends where your imagination runs wild. I miss being smart. I believe that i'm a smart person, just not as smart as i was growing up. I used to read historical and political books when i was 12. I miss the 7 months i spent in Eritrea. I did nothing but spend time with friends and family. I miss true friendship. I miss watching Tom & Jerry, Power Rangers, The Cosby Show, A Different World, Boy Meets World. I miss 90's R&B: Xscape, Jodeci, RKelly, EnVogue, Ginuwine, BlackStreet and more. I miss living at home. I miss not having to worrying about paying next month's rent. I miss Houston. I miss affection. I miss stability. I miss comfort.
Basically, I miss my past, because I'm annoyed by my present and I'm not sure about my future!!

God is Good!!

So on Tuesday, I go on campus since there was a hip-hop feminist speaking and really wanted to hear what she had to say. Had a great time with my friend, Debbie and we both decided to stop by Starbucks before we went our seperate ways for the night. We walked by the newspaper stand so i picked up a copy of The Shorthorn (UTA's newspaper) and started reading the front page and saw that they were having a Career Fair. I have been looking for a job on Monster, HotJobs and CareerBuilder and had started giving up on the search. By the time i read about the career fair, it was already 10 p.m but u decided to go ahead and print some resumes and try my luck at the career fair. I get to the fair at 11 a.m, the first company I talked to was Target. They gave me some info on the company, told me to apply for the Executive Team Leader position and that i would get a call by the end of next week. Now you might think that this is not a big deal, but it was a big deal to me because i saw this whole event as a sign from God. God was telling me not to give up so fast. The reason i say that is because my mentor, Mr. Henry, works for Target and i ended up talking to him yesterday, he encouraged me to apply for the position and even gave me his Employee Id # for the referral. So i say God is Good because everything that transpired yesterday was God's work. I had nothing to do with it, God knew what position i am in and he blessed me.
So say it with me.........God is Good, All the Time.........All the Time, God is Good!!!
When i get that job, I'm going to make God and my mom proud!!!!!!
And i forgot to add that my sis, Abby, has an interview tomorrow, God is really Good!!!!

Search..... and you shall find a better you!!

I have been searching for something all my life; what that something is i am yet to find out. I guess the search is what makes us all human, looking for that something that will give us that sense of achievement. The most important search in life is the search for oneself. You need to able to find yourself in the midst of the chaos of daily life since you don't want your search to be effortless. Once you have found yourself, u can go for more searching. Your searches will lead you to both success and failure, happiness and sadness but most importantly your search will make a difference when death comes knocking at your door. Life is full of searching and by searching you reach multiple goals whether you like it or not. Every chapter of your life has been reached after searching. So as i search to see where my life will lead me next, i wonder if u are searching along with me!!!

Passion dying away!!

Every day that passes me by, i feel even emptier inside. My passion seems to die with every moment that slips through the cracks of my hands. Recent achievements seem worthless. Degrees are just pieces of paper, nothing more, nothing less. Friendship means so much to me but is so overrated for others, thus friendship is overrated. Loyalty might be important to me but not so important to others and so every day my feelings seem to get crushed. I feel like i'm digging a hole for myself. There is no one here to save me but myself but i'm constantly losing myself. My life has been swallowed by a giant whale that doesn't know where its headed, it hungers for more though. My soul seems to survive through all the pain and heartbreak, i don't know how. I guess that's what makes me a strong person. I just want to escape for a while, go somewhere far away from here and just relax.